Young Widows In The Church

I Timothy 5:11-16

There is an innate desire within most people to have a family of their own. Sometimes, because we live in a sin-cursed world, those who start out on the journey of building their own family suddenly find their dreams come crashing down. The person they thought they would spend the rest of their life with is suddenly taken. It could be an accident, war, sickness, or a senseless act of violence that brings their world crashing down around them. In a instant, a young woman may find herself in the category of widow. That is the next topic Paul addresses with Timothy.

---

”But refuse the younger widows; for when they have begun to grow wanton against Christ, they desire to marry, having condemnation because they have cast off their first faith. And besides they learn to be idle, wandering about from house to house, and not only idle but also gossips and busybodies, saying things which they ought not. Therefore I desire that the younger widows marry, bear children, manage the house, give no opportunity to the adversary to speak reproachfully. For some have already turned aside after Satan. If any believing man or woman has widows, let them relieve them, and do not let the church be burdened, that it may relieve those who are really widows.”

I Timothy 5:11-16

---

The first thing that we must understand is that this is not an indictment against all young widows. Paul is speaking in a general sense about why this Biblical principle is in place. There are very Godly women who have lost their husbands at a young age and continued both single and faithful to God. As a matter of fact, one of the first people to interact with Jesus after his birth was just such a women. Luke, a disciple and friend of Paul, tells about this woman named Anna:

---

“Now there was one, Anna, a prophetess, the daughter of Phanuel, of the tribe of Asher. She was of a great age, and had lived with a husband seven years from her virginity; and this woman was a widow of about eighty-four years, who did not depart from the temple, but served God with fastings and prayers night and day. And coming in that instant she gave thanks to the Lord, and spoke of Him to all those who looked for redemption in Jerusalem.”

Luke 2:36-38

---

If a young widow chooses to dedicate her life completely to God, then so be it. However, if that desire for companionship and a family is strong, Paul says that she should remarry. He said the same thing for young men in I Corinthians 7:7-9, "For I wish that all men were even as I myself. But each one has his own gift from God, one in this manner and another in that. But I say to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain even as I am; but if they cannot exercise self-control, let them marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion". That is the issue at hand, self-control and obedience to God.

First, there is the issue of adultery. Paul is saying that if the woman's desire for companionship will, while remaining single, result in her having relationships outside of marriage, it is better for her to remarry. The church is not under any duty to care for her, especially if it would lead to her living in sin. God has one standard. He designed sex for spouses. There is no exception. Anything else is sin. The church caring for the young widow is not to become a source of her falling into sin.

Second, if her being cared for will lead to idleness, and thereby sins of gossip and minding others' business. While these sins are not only committed by single people, again Paul is not wanting to set young widows up for failure because of idleness. Taking care of a family is a full time job. At this time, that was the job of women. There were some outside jobs available, but rarely did a women do these (Lydia is an exception in Acts 16:14). If the church providing for the woman financially would cause her to walk away from faithfulness to God, the church was not to provide the care. She was to remarry or to be cared for by her family.

Third, in this text is the idea of family caring for family again. Paul, led by the Holy Spirit, is adamant that family has a responsibility to care for one another. If, and only if there is no family to care for a widow, should the church provide for her. It is not a matter of love, but rather one of divine responsibility. Family taking care of each other is God's design, from the cradle to the grave. Because we live in a sin-cursed world and death comes because of sin, God directed His church to take up the slack if there is no family.

The church is to build people up. It is not to enable someone to sin, nor to cause them to fall into sin. This is a theme that is discussed multiple times in Paul's letters. The church is not here to make life easy, but rather to making living obedient lives to God possible. A person cannot serve God if they starve to death. We are not demonstrating love if we ignore those who are incapable of caring for themselves. However, the church is under no obligation to care for those who can provide for themselves, but choose not to. The church is under no obligation to provide care where such care could cause someone to fall into sin or continue in sin. It should also be noted that these widows were already in the church. This was not care for those outside the church. I'm not saying we cannot help those outside the church. I am speaking of the scriptural mandate for the church to provide care.

Father, obedience to these passages require wisdom. I pray that You would give us wisdom to know when we are to provide aid, and when we need to let people take care of themselves. There are those who would say that not giving is hateful. Others would say we are enabling. May we be obedient to You because we follow Your Word and Your Spirit's leading.