Disagreement Among Friends

Job 6

Apparently Eliphaz spoke with a degree of compassion and visible concern for his friend Job. He must have sincerely believed the words that he spoke. The reason I infer this is because Job's response is not harsh. He mostly speaks of his despair and then tells his friends to prove their point. There do not appear to be harsh words being exchanged, yet.

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8 Oh that I might have my request;

And that God would grant me the thing that I long for!

9 Even that it would please God to destroy me;

That he would let loose his hand, and cut me off!

Job 6:8-9

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Job again expresses his desire to die. He is not suicidal. He is a man who is hurting. As we will see in the next selected verse, he feels hopeless. His belief that he has lost all of his possessions, all of his children, and his health leave his wanting relief. This is a man who has enjoyed life before the events of chapter 1, but now, it is a burden greater than he believes he can bear.

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What is my strength, that I should hope?

And what is mine end, that I should prolong my life?

Job 6:11

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Here, Job asks a telling question, "What hope do I have in continuing to live?" Job feels that he does not have a future other than more physical suffering. This belief drives his desire to die.

Beliefs tend to be self fulfilling prophesies. They tend to either build us up, tear us down, or prove psychosis. I didn't want to include that last one, but it had to be there. If a person genuinely believes they are a fish, they need help. Concerning the other two, we tend to live life based on our beliefs. A person who believes that they will not get a job, often goes into an interview and self-sabotages. Their whole demeanor conveys to the employer that they should not hire this individual. On the other hand, a person who believes that they can get the job will show confidence. This tells the employer that they both want the job and can do the job. Our belief about life drives us.

Thank God that he can send people to help change our beliefs and he can intervene himself. If not, we might want to quit reading this book now. If there was no hope of change for Job, why would we want to read this?

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To him that is afflicted pity should be shewed from his friend...

Job 6:14

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Here Job tries to shift the direction of his friends speech with a mild reprimand. I believe that Job is speaking both from his own desire for pity, but also from life experience in dealing with others. Job knows that those who are grieving do not need correction. It simply isn't the time. They need a shoulder to lean on, to cry on, and to depend on. What Eliphaz has begun is the epitome of "kicking someone while they are down".

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24 Teach me, and I will hold my tongue:

And cause me to understand wherein I have erred.

25 How forcible are right words!

But what doth your arguing reprove?

Job 6:24-25

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The final verse I want to consider today reveal one more lesson about Job's mindset at this point in the story. What we see from these verses is that Job is still willing to listen. He tells his friends to prove their point by presenting facts. If they are going to chastise him for some sin, they need to have evidence of that sin. If they can do that, he will gladly listen to them.

It would be so easy to run off in the direction of people levying baseless charges against others to support their agendas. We see a lot of that today. However, I am going to force myself to stay on track and talk about Job. There is a great less that we can all learn from this.

Job was willing to listen. He says so in verse 24, "Teach me, and I will hold my tongue: and cause me to understand wherein I have erred". Job tells his friends to tell him what sin he has committed and he will listen. We need to be that way with our friends as well. When a friend tells us that we are doing wrong, we should be willing to listen. However, we often want to write them off. When a friend earnestly corrects us and it make us so mad that we are willing to end the friendship, this does not prove that they were not a good friend, but that we are not a good friend. Friends should be able to be honest, even in disagreement. When we are willing to end a friendship so quickly, we are the weak link in the friendship.

Two takeaways from today's chapter: 1.) Our beliefs often become self-fulfilling prophecies, and 2.) Don't be to haste in writing off friends when they say something we do not like. I'm not going to talk about both of these again. Both points give all of us something to think about. It is easy to be on the wrong side of these. As we will see, God wanted to grow Job in both of these areas (along with other areas). We need to be willing to grown in them as well, but we should be aware that to grow in them, we will be tested.

Father help me to have Godly beliefs about myself. May my beliefs align with your will for my life. When friends rightly correct me, help me to listen and not be angry. Then, when I need to change, may I be willing to change and to grow in you. Thank you for friends who are willing to tell us the truth, even when it hurts.